


Lay with me

by maddestwoman



Category: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV)
Genre: F/M, Pining, Post-Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:15:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22367782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddestwoman/pseuds/maddestwoman
Summary: Lenny Bruce may or may not be in stupidly in love with Midge Maisel. This is a particularly bad idea because she is so far out of his league, it's ridiculous, and also because she's his friend. And Bruce could never risk it.Just a sad little drabble, set partly after episode 5, mostly after the season finale.
Relationships: Lenny Bruce (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel)/Miriam "Midge" Maisel
Comments: 14
Kudos: 101





	Lay with me

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something I felt inspired to write after watching the new season and after shipping these two since the pilot. It's my first fic tho, so let's see how this goes.
> 
> Also, English is not my first language, so if you would be kind enough to point out any mistakes you see, that would be delightful.

Lenny was fine. Really. He had had no expectations for that night and it's not as if he thought someone like Midge fuckin Meisel would ever give him the time of day. 

It still had hurt though, seeing her walk away. They had had such a good night together. He wished he could have stretched it out. Made it last longer, somehow. 

Wished he could still feel her hand brushing softly against his neck. Her head on his chest. 

Damn. When had he become such a sissy anyway? 

"It's a date" she had said. 

He knew better than to take her at her word. 

Lenny had been having a tough time lately. Wondering what he was doing with his life. 

Probably why his "before I’m dead" joke had sounded a bit more serious than it should've. 

One of his friends had just died. They hadn’t been particularly close, but they had run in the same circles. Overdose. It had felt more like a warning than Lenny would care to admit, but he also knew he wasn’t about to “turn his life around” or some bullshit. 

He knew who he was. And he was no idiot. It’s all about finding a balance. About being careful. He could do it. 

Like with Midge. 

He had been more blatant this time than ever before. He hoped he hadn’t stepped too far over the imaginary line in their lives that separated what they were and what they weren’t. He hoped he hadn’t let her see so much that he would lose her friendship. 

She was a good friend to have. Funny. Lenny didn’t know many people he thought were funny, believe it or not. Probably why he had taken it upon himself to tell the jokes, come to think of it. 

She hadn’t seemed too bothered by the whole thing though, had she? If it had been anyone else, Lenny would have thought he had a chance. Not with Midge, of course. Lenny wasn’t stupid enough to let himself have expectations with Midge. 

Not even standing there. In front of his room. His jacket on her shoulders. 

He wished she had let him call her a cab. Steal those extra seconds walking her to it. Open the door for her and close it after her. Watch her drive away, probably making idle conversation with the driver, as though it wasn’t unreasonably late. 

Midge fucking Meisel.

He thought too much about her. 

That was the only conclusion he reached that night, sitting on the floor outside of his hotel room, out of cigarettes and uncomfortably sober. 

And he made sure it still held true for the three months that passed before he saw her again.

\------

Midge was sitting in a stool in the Gaslight, smoking. She was wearing a black sweater and black pants and was the most beautiful woman Lenny had ever seen.

He had come here because of her, if he was honest. He had hoped for a quiet evening of terrible entertainment, reminiscing on that glorious night when he had introduced her to that very stage. She had looked so happy that day, her smile upstaging her pearls.

But he hadn’t thought he would find her here, because if he remembered correctly, she should’ve been somewhere in the other side of the ocean right about now.

As he approached her, he wondered about the possibility of her being a hallucination. He had been a little careless lately, maybe the drugs had finally fucked up his brain beyond repair.

-Hello there, stranger.

She turned around and she was oh so real. Something must be very wrong for her to be here instead of Europe, but Lenny wanted to get on his knees and thank the Lord he didn't believe him for her presence in the Gaslight that night. And for her existence, too, since we are at it.

-I’m sorry, have we met?

She smiled a little and Lenny sat next to her.

-I really have to lay off the drugs, cause I just came all the way to Europe and don’t remember a thing.

-You’re hilarious, have you thought of going into comedy? - she deadpanned.

-I could never be brave enough to compete in the same industry as you.

-Flattery will get you nowhere.

-And what will?

Lenny wanted to kick himself as soon as he asked the question, but the words had just poured out of his mouth, effortlessly, like they always did when he was around her.

Midge, on the other hand, smiled.

-How about you buy me a drink?

-How about you tell me what’s going on?

-I said some things that implied some things that got me kicked out of the tour. You happy? Now get me that drink.

Lenny didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say and he had already pressed her enough for one night. He ordered her a gin tonic, a whiskey for himself.  
They were both silent for a while after that. Looking at each other. That had become a thing that they did, apparently. Lenny wanted to laugh. Or to die. Definitely one of the two.

Midge was playing with her glass, running the edge of it on her lower lip, making it glisten with alcohol. Lenny wanted to bite it and was not stupid enough to not realize that was the reaction she was trying to elicit.

Was she really so upset, that she would take them both back there? Maybe she just didn’t care about their friendship as much as Lenny did.

Or maybe she was better at compartmentalizing.

-You’re so pretty – she commented, then – there’s just something about you.

-I should get you home, I think you’re drunk.

-I hadn’t drank anything before this – she looked at him in the eye as she said it. Not a trace of hesitation in her demeanor. He wanted her so much. – But you can take me home if you want. As long as it’s yours.

After that, she was gifted the rare sight of Lenny Bruce blushing. Call the papers.

She got up to her feet and finished her drink in one last, elegant, gulp.

-So, you in?

Midge took his hand and walked him out of the pub, still too stunned to answer. She was calling a cab when he finally got his voice back. 

-Why the change of mind?

-There has been none. I wanted to fuck you that night too.

-So why didn’t you? – She had spoken so casually, but when he tried to imitate her tone he sounded weirdly strained, like someone was stepping on his neck.

-I got scared.

-Of what?

-You. You leaving. Me leaving. Me staying. I don’t know what ends up worse and it terrifies me.

-Present tense?

-Very present.

-So, what changed?

-You are here in front of me looking pretty and I guess I’m weaker now.

The taxi pulled up in front of them. Lenny opened the door, she stepped in and so did he. Sitting there together in the backseat of a car, he thought back to the first time he had seen her. Such a mess in her night gown. He hadn’t known anything, then.

-So, what’s the plan?

-I’m going to fuck you until my obsession with you goes away or I fall in love with you.

The taxi driver turned around, more scandalized that Lenny thought was warranted in someone who drives around New Your city in the wee hours of the morning. Midge smiled adorably at him until he turned back around, as though she had been talking about knitting.

Lenny’s hands were sweating. It felt as though Lenny’s soul was sweating. This shouldn’t be happening, he knew. She wasn’t being herself. If he went through with this, he was gonna lose her.

Then again, who was he to decide what she could and could not do? What was good or bad for her? He barely knew what was good and bad for himself, for God’s sake.

But he was gonna lose her.

Lose the random encounters in shitty bars. The silent inside jokes. The way every night felt full of stars when he had seen her, despite the blinding New York lights.

The cab stopped in front of his apartment. A little shithole he had rented after coming back from Florida, small enough that he could save most of his money for future lawyers.

He got out and paid the cabbie. When he turned around, Midge was there: a smile on her face that was but a pale imitation of the one that used to come so easy to her.

She didn’t belong here. Not a single part of her should ever be exposed to an an apartment like his. To a life like his.

To him. 

He walked up the stairs and she followed. Lenny was a little surprised she didn’t have a million things to comment, but that just went to show how much she wasn’t really her. Or not the her he knew, anyway. She really must have fucked up badly. He wanted to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be fine. 

What an idiot he was. He didn’t even know what was wrong. Not really.

He wanted to go to sleep and wake up in a world where Midge was touring through Europe and her eyes were shining instead of full of shadows.

She walked into his apartment before him. He would have thought she would be curious, but she just kicked off her flats and shook off her coat. The all-black clothing underneath traced every curve of her body as she walked toward the area of the room that pretended to be a kitchen.

He wanted her so badly. But he wanted her happy more, didn’t he?

-Do you have something to drink? – she asked as she opened his fridge.

He realized at that moment he didn’t even know what was in it.

-I think you’ve had enough.

-I told you I’ve only had the one.

-Then why are you acting like this?

-Like what?

-Like you are some other person! Do you wanna talk about it? I’m sure it wasn’t that bad! You can recover from anything in this business!

He sounded pleading even to his own ears. He hadn’t meant to. He hadn’t meant for her to look at him like he was an arrogant, ignorant asshole either. He hadn’t even known one could look at someone like that. And yet.

-I really don’t care about your clever opinions right now.

Looking through the cupboards she had found a bottle of vodka Lenny didn’t remember he had. She took a swig of it nonchalantly, looking weirdly put-together for someone drinking from a bottle in a substandard apartment at four in the morning.

-I just wanna help.

-Then put on some music. Pretend to be a gentleman for a few moments. And then take me to your bed.

-I’m not gonna do that.

Midge looked at him. Really looked at him. For what seemed liked the first time that night.

-Please, Lenny. I don’t wanna go home tonight.

He walked toward her. On instinct. Like a moth toward a flame. And put his arms around her. He wanted this woman more than anything and yet, this was the most platonic gesture he had ever had toward another human being, male or female. Maybe he was finally maturing.

She responded to his hug immediately and, for a moment, he felt like her lifeline. She sobbed.

-You can sleep here if you want to. I have an extra mattress I can sleep in; I think.

He most definitely didn’t. He didn’t even have a couch. But she didn’t need to know that. And he would happily take the floor, for her.

-Please, sleep with me. – she asked, quietly. He wondered if she was still crying. – We don’t have to have sex if you don’t want to, but I need someone to hold me tonight or I’m afraid I’ll crumble.

If he didn’t want to. What a joke.

-Ok, don’t worry, you’re fine. I’ll be here.

He walked her toward the bed, without breaking their embrace. He laid her down carefully, as though she really was gonna break.

Then, he tried to get back up.

-Please, Lenny.

-I’m not leaving you; I just need to take off my coat. Is that ok?

She let him go, then. When he ventured a look at her, he could tell that she was eyeing him suspiciously, as though he could ever leave her. Her mascara was a mess around her eyes.

Lenny took off his coat and his shoes, then his jacket and his tie.

-So pretty – she murmured. Lenny didn’t think it was meant for him to hear. She may not even have been talking about him. But he felt warm all the same.

When had he become a teenage girl?

He left the rest of his clothes on, for good measure.

Then, he went to lie beside her.

He was lucky it was hot enough that they didn’t need to get under the covers, although he felt weirdly unsafe this way. She put one of her legs and one of her arms on top of him, then laid her head in his shoulder.

And they just laid there. To the point that Lenny thought she had managed to fall asleep. Not that he ever would be able to.

-You’re a good man.

Midge spoke with unexpected clarity. Her face coming up to look at him. Sure, and steady. Before he could answer she leant forward, pressed her lips against his for a second, and went right to sleep.

Lenny spent the rest of the night wondering if he had dreamt it.


End file.
